Adoptive Mothers

A Note from the founders: We decided to do this page for adoptive mothers because we believe that open relationships between the adoptive mother and the birth mother are best for the child. We hope, that through our site and this page, adoptive mothers have the chance to see insight into a birthmother's heart. We are all in this for the same reason - the love of our child. Please respect that the main purpose of BirthMom Buds is to support birth moms and women who are pregnant and considering adoption.

If you are an adoptive parent or are planning on becoming one here are some words of advice from one adoptive mom to another ~

Let the Birthmother take the lead in the amount of contact before and be honest with her about the after. . (Some potential birthmothers will want everyday contact before birth, some once a week or once a month or none at all)
If you can, together with the birthmother, choose a hospital that is adoption friendly. Some hospitals are not adoption friendly to you or the birthmother. Some hospitals will not allow the adoptive parents in the room or to stay over night even if the expectant mom asks you to. Some will force the expectant mother to hold the baby first even if she doesn't want to, and some badger her. You can contact BirthMom Buds for a copy of their Hospital Action Plan.
Try and educate yourself as much as possible about adoption. Read books about adoption, educate yourself about the different types of adoption, read up on birthmother's issues, issues that some adoptees may face, etc...