BirthMom Buds Bulletin July 2006

"I feel enormous love for whoever my children's birth parents are," Nicole Kidman
says. "And if my children choose to go find them at some stage, I can't
wait. Because - it's the weirdest thing - I actually feel (they're) very
connected to us as a big, strange family."

What's new with BirthMom Buds: Just a little note to keep you up to date with all the great things we are doing.
Buddy System ~ Coley is a little behind on buddy system matches. Please bear with us and hopefully, all records will be updated soon and everyone awaiting a buddy will receive one.
Forums and Chat ~ Don't forget to register and check out the forums. There is awesome support to be found in the forums. Private chats are held on Monday nights at 10 pm eastern. For more details or to receive a chat reminder, sign up for the e-list on the chat page.
New Poems ~ Check out the new poems on the Inspiration page.
Turn Trash into Cash for BBuds ~ Fellow member Joyce B. has brought an exciting fundraising opportunity to us. By simply turning in our old cell phones and used printer cartridges, Cartridges for Kids, will make monetary donations to BirthMom Buds. BBuds uses monetary donations for shipping on the care packages, toll free phone bill, website fees, etc. If you have an old cell phone or ink cartridges lying around, email Joyce and she'll send you a pre-paid postal envelope. This is so easy - why not tell your friends and family about this too!
Engagement ~ We are pleased to announce the engagement of Ms. Amy Morse (our birthday coordinator) to Mr. Rob Schumaker. A wedding is planned for May 2007. Congrats Amy!

Adoption Spotlight: Focusing on any adoption or women's issues related web site, organization, individual, or issue.

Like many people, at least I hope many people; I had no idea what a blog was until I started this article. The concept is simple really. A blog is an online diary or journal. It’s basically a diary that anyone/everyone can read and comment on if they wish. A person can post pictures, articles, or simply opinions on any subject they want. Blogs can be used as a form of instant messaging for work and for play. I have discovered some great places to find adoption related blogs. Blogs ranging from open adoption, to international adoption, to search and reunions and blogs by adoptive parents, birth parents, and adoptees.

At About Adoption, you will find links to adoption blogs written by birthmoms. these links, are mostly journals that span years of writing for these birthmoms. Each story is very unique and very much worth the time to read. I have learned more about myself, and my journey by reading the stories on these pages. One of the neatest ones, was "Dot's" blog. Dot started her blog early in her pregnancy while she was making an adoption plan and you follow her to present time, where she has just placed her baby recenlty. Kim Kim's Journal shares her search and reunion journey. I encourage anyone/everyone to take a look into these blogs.

Another great place to find lots of blogs is Adoption Blogs. They have tons of blogs on everything from crisis pregnancy (Coley is the crisis pregnancy blogger!) to special needs adoption to search and reunion. This is is another great place to find information. I have not done a great amount of searching through this website, as it is somewhat new to me. However, so far… seems very useful and has great stories as well.

I have found blogging to be very informative, and very therapeutic. And that’s just by reading them. I am considering starting an adoption blog of my own. As I read in one blog, it would be great to share the journey I have gone through to get to where I am today with my child someday. Blogging is the computer age diary. Forget about putting a lock on your journal and hiding it underneath the mattress - it’s all about blogging.

Ideas and Insights: Some ideas for gifts to your birth child or adoptive parents, creative ways to deal with being a birthmom, insight on things to do or say with your buddy, and ways to shed some light about being a birthmom to those who just don't get it.

Adoption Books and Movies to Help Explain
The Child You Place to the Child(ren) You are Parenting
By Suzi Thompson

Here is a follow up to the article I wrote last month on When and How to Tell the Child(ren) you are Parenting About the One you Placed. After looking around on some websites, doing some reading, and consulting with Coley, I was able to find these books and movies that have the adoption theme in them. Using these books and movies will make telling your child about the child you placed for adoption a little easier.

“Emma’s Story” by Emma Hodge
“Emma’s Story is about a little girl who was born in China and adopted into the United States and comes to realize that she doesn’t look like everyone else in her family. The story goes on to reveal her adoption story and how she came to bring joy to her family.
This can be found online at eBay or Tapestry Books
Price range: $7.61- $17.95

“Beginnings: How Families Come to Be” by Virginia Kroll
This book tells the many different ways of how families come to be. It goes from a typical birth to adoption in all forms, guardianship and single parents. This is a wonderful book that would help your child understand that there are many ways a family can come to be.
This can be found online at eBay, Tapestry Books, Barnes & Noble
Price range: $2.90 - $11.00

“Zachary’s New Home” by Geraldine M. Blomquist
The story of the little kitten, who's daddy disappears, and Mummy is bad to him, is well written and non judgmental. The kitten is taken away from his birth mother and fostered, then adopted into a family of Swans, who love him. The book tells about the kitten's confusion and feelings of loss, and has a happy ending when the adoptive parents re-state their love for him.
This can be found online at eBay, Tapestry Books, Barnes & Noble,
Price Range: $3.00 - $8.95

“Sam’s Sister”, by Juliet C. Bond
Rosa’s mother finds out she’s pregnant and goes on to explain to her that she can’t provide for this baby and how she knows of a family who can. After the baby (Sam) is born Rosa and her mother get to help pick out her middle name and keep in contact with her. It explains Rosa’s feelings with sadness and knowing Sam is in a better place.
This can be found online at eBay, Tapestry Books
Price Range: $16.18 - $18.00

Babe, Rated G
Babe is about a pig that is won at a county fair and then moved to a new farm. Babe is “adopted” by a mother sheepdog and by watching learns to become a good sheep” pig”. It is a wonderful story that a child of all ages would enjoy.
This movie can be found almost anywhere, and at most movie rental stores.

Lilo and Stitch, Rated G
Lilo is being raised by her older sister because her parents died when she was young. She finds an alien and they become friends trying to defeat the enemy, Stitch’s creators.
This movie can be found almost anywhere; it is also aired on the Disney channel quite frequently.

Snow Dogs, Rated PG
When a Miami dentist inherits a team of sled dogs, he's got to learn the trade or lose his pack to a crusty mountain man.
This movie can be found at most movie rental stores.

Elf the Movie, Rated PG
After inadvertently wreaking havoc on the elf community due to his ungainly size, a man raised as an elf at the North Pole is sent to the U.S. in search of his true identity.
This movie can be found almost anywhere, and at most movie rental stores.

Other ideas:
Take your child on an outing to one of these stores
Build a bear workshop
Cabbage Patch Land

Buddy of the Month: All of you are appreciated, but each month we will spotlight a different involved member. You can also nominate fellow BirthMom Buds who you think deserve to be buddy of the month. For more info or to nominate a friend, visit the Buddy of the Month Page.

Meet Jenifer Hulburt - this month's Buddy of the Month! It just so happens that Jen and her twin Randy, celebrate their birthday this month on July 21 . So Happy Birthday to Jen and Randy! He is on a 2 week leave right now from his deployment in Iraq. Jen says, "Thank you Randy, for serving our country and making it safe for us here at home!"

Jenifer is a newlywed who married her childhood sweetheart after 8 years, when they reconnected. She considers herself an outdoor person. "I love the garden I have started and the planter I built." She loves nature and is in awe of waterfalls. She says, "I could just stare at waterfalls for hours." She even got married at a beautiful outdoor location, at the top of a 90 foot cliff in Pismo Beach overlooking the ocean.

Going back to her childhood, Jen loved her dolls. Second grade was her favorite grade and she recalls the yummy tater tots the school cafeteria served them. Her most memorable childhood toy was her skateboard. Her most memorable childhood memories were when she was in gymnastics performing in a group named Break the Barriers. They performed with a group of able and disabled kids all over the city of Fresno, and included a performance at the Special Olympics.

When Jenifer is indoors, she spends the most time in her home office doing school work. Jenifer is pursuing her degree in Nursing.

Jenifer is the birthmom to 10 year old Amanda. Jenifer receives a letter and pictures from Amanda's a-family twice a year. Jenifer has been involved with BirthMom Buds for about 3 years now. She has mentored about 5 girls through the pregnant and placing program and is a regular contributing writer for the BirthMom Buds Bulletin. She is also a part of a panel that shares individual adoption stories, for the County of San Bernardino that speaks to prospective families, as well as birthfamilies.

Jen and her husband Steve are the proud "parents" of 2 spoiled brats, I mean doggies. The very

spoiled doggies, Ginger and Josie, have their own misting system out in their dog run to keep them cool on those really hot days. Jen, Steve, and the girls reside in Hesperia, CA.

Prayers Please ~ We added this section because so many of you have asked us to remember you or your loved ones in our prayers. We have never wanted to force religion on anyone, so if you don't pray, then skip this section and go on to the next! And if you do pray - add the people listed here to your prayer list. Mary (Snowprincess in our chats) has agreed to be in charge of this section, so please send your prayer requests to her - just put "BBuds prayer request" in the subject so she won't think it's junk mail! :)

"My name is Kelli and I just placed my 10-month-old daughter for adoption last week. I really need some prayers and support, and my 2 year old is having a hard time with it, so please pray for Kelsi too." ~ Kelli Hopkins

"I am a birthmother of a beautiful 15 month old little girl. But my son, who is 5, is having some medical problems. In the past week, he has had an MRI and an EEG done. Also, my nephew who is 4 months old was born with out a rectum is going in for surgery early next month to repair it. I am asking for everyone to please pray for my son and nephew. Thank you." ~ Emily

"Please pray for fellow BBud, Jenn Morkve. She is in the hospital and very sick and we still are unsure what is wrong. Please pray that the doctors make her better quickly. And please pray for her 4 children who are having to stay with neighbors while Jen is ill. Thanks!" ~ Suzi and Coley

"Please continue to pray for me. Last month, I asked for prayers that a D&C would go well. My follow up is coming up and it looks like we may still have to do the full hysterectomy. So please keep me and my family in your prayers." ~ Tamara Hamlin

Birthday Buds:
Around her birth daughter's 1st birthday, Amy Morse had the bright idea that BirthMom Buds should give members the opportunity to announce their birthdays and their birth children's bdays in the newsletter. If you would like to have your birthday or your birth child's birthday mentioned in this section, please email the birth date, your name or your child's name, to Amy by the 25th of the month before your birthday. For example, if your child's birthday is March 21, then you need to email it to Amy by Feb 25th! So email Amy with those March birthdays now! We hope you enjoy the new section and thanks to Amy for her help with it! (Note: You can click on the persons' name to send them a birthday ecard or email.)

Oops, we accidentally missed a few from June. Amy was moving and her schedule was hectic. So happy belated to the June bdays!
Joye H.'s birthdaughter turned 11 on June 6th.
Robyn Radsick birthdaughter, Jadyn Faith's birthday is June 11.
Tamara Hamlin's birthdaughter, Hadlee, turned 1 on June 11th.

July Birthdays
Lani D. celebrates her birthday on July 4th.
Debbie Fauskee's son, Jeff, will turn 30 on July 5th.
Olvia Garcia celebrates her birthday July 29th.
Stephanie Drew's son Caleb turns 6 on July 31.

Founder's Corner: A little section to help keep you up to date with Coley and Lani as they share their lives, their thoughts, and what they're doing with BirthMom Buds.

Inspiration: Little things to inspire a birthmom from poems, stories, and quotes to encouraging words.