BirthMom Buds
Bulletin
June 2005
I’d rather regret the
things that I have done, than the things that I have not done.
--- Lucille Ball
What's new with BirthMom Buds:
Just a little note to keep you up to date with all the great things we are
doing!
Writers needed ~ As always we are in need of writers for the
newsletter! This is YOUR newsletter so we need YOUR thought, ideas, help,
articles, poems, etc. If interested in assisting, please email
Alicia or visit our
newsletter ideas
page for some suggested topics. We especially need articles for the adoption
spotlight section!
Birthmother's Day ~ We hope all of you had a good birthmother's
day whatever you were doing, where ever you were doing it! We have pictures up
from Luau for Life
and the Spokane
get together.
New email address - BirthMom Buds is changing our email address to
a new g-mail email address. Gmail makes sending out mass volumes of emails much
easier so in turn this will make our lives much easier. The yahoo addy will stay
up for awhile. Please make note of the new addy -
birthmombuds@gmail.com
Showcase Pages ~ Check out the new showcase pages for
Leigh and
Sarah R. If
you'd like to have your very own page on our Bmom's Showcase, please
email Coley for more info.
Poetry ~ Check out the
new poem on the
Inspiration page.
Chat Night ~ Many of you have been attending our Monday night chats.
We now have them in a private yahoo chat room. You can IM Coley or Lani on
Monday nights for an invite or you can sign up for the mailing list to remind
you of chat on the Chat Page.
If you have been in chat recently, you know there are many new faces. Some of us
have trouble keeping people straight, so Tracy V and Mary had the bright idea of
creating a chat "scorecard" to help keep everyone straight. You can print your
own scorecard by going to
this page.
Pregnant and Placing Program Volunteer Needed ~ Jo V our
pregnant and placing coordinator will need to take some time off for a few
months towards the end of the summer. We are looking for someone to run the
program for Jo until she comes back. Running the program consists of processing
new mentees, matching them with mentors, keeping BirthMom Buds advised of their
status, etc. If you're interested please email
BirthMom Buds for more
details.
BBuds in the News ~ Check out the
article
about BirthMom Buds in Focus on the Family written by Shanna Shutte.
Kudos to our Volunteers ~ Everyone who "works" at BirthMom
Buds is a volunteer. They do their duties here in addition to their home life,
jobs, etc... We try our best but we are all human and do make mistakes. We
appreciate you being thoughtful and understanding when dealing with "the staff."
And to the people who do volunteer - we appreciate you and couldn't do it with
out you!
Adoption Spotlight: Focusing on any adoption or women's issues related web site, organization, individual, or issue.
Book review on a children’s adoption book
By Coley Strickland
For those of us in an open adoption, adoption books make a great gift for our birth children. Many adoptive parents, whether the adoption is open or closed, turn to adoption books as a teaching tool in helping young children understand about adoption and the love of their birthmother.
Never Never Never Will She Stop Loving You, the Adoption Love Story of Angel Annie by Jolene Durrant is a children’s book that explains adoption. The book starts off talking to “Annie’s child” by telling him he is special because he has 2 mothers. The book talks of Annie’s special love for her child, how she took care of him before he was born by eating right, not taking drugs or medicine, and following the doctor’s instructions. The book talks of how Annie wanted to be with her son, to parent him, but she felt he deserved more than she could give him at that time.
This book is illustrated by children so the artwork is very simple. Because of the artwork and the simple way adoption is explained, I think this book is best for younger children. In my opinion, I feel it’s appropriate for children who are anywhere from age 2-8.
As a birthmother, I was pleased with the book. Granted, it will not fit every
adoption situation, but the underlying message, a birthmother’s never ending
love for her child, will fit every adoption situation.
On a more personal note, I gave a copy of this book to my birthson on his 3rd
birthday. I wrote an inscription in the front of the book that like the child in
the book, he is very special because he has 2 mothers.
Ideas and Insights: Some ideas from gifts to your birth child or adoptive parents, creative ways to deal with being a birthmom, insight on things to do or say with your buddy, and ways to shed some light about being a birthmom to those who just don't get it.
A Healthy Lifestyle for Women
By Terri Spencer
First and foremost, before we are mothers or birthmothers, we are women. Women with families, careers, passions - busy lives. We need to try and take care of ourselves so that we can do all we are obligated to do, want to do, etc…
Here are some things women can do in terms of their diet to make sure they eat healthy even though busy:
It is very important to get enough sleep! Most people blame stress to not being able to sleep well. One thing that works for me before bed is doing stretching exercises. This helps calm the mind enough to help with sleep. I start out my day with stretching as well because when waking up, stretching is energizing.
It is important to exercise too! I find that exercise helps in many ways. I sleep better at night. It helps with losing weight by increasing ones metabolism. It also strengthens the heart and muscles. It RELIEVES STRESS! Exercise also combats depression and stops anxiety! I’ve been exercising daily since October of 2004 and never felt better! I have more energy now and feel healthier than I have in years! I’ve lost a lot of weight too! I’ve lost 20 pounds in 3 months and gone from a size 14 down to a size 8 in clothes! I still have a weight loss goal of wanting to loose another 20 pounds though.
In terms of exercise, a person should do what they feel most comfortable with; however, I was told the 2 best exercises for loosing weight and to have a better healthier body is walking and swimming. Personally, I prefer swimming to anything else because I love the water so much!
Also set aside time for yourself every day to do something you enjoy! I think that is very important! Another good tip is to journal if possible. I find that getting my thoughts and feelings down on paper is therapeutic. I find it relieves stress.
These are some of the things that I do and some of these things I’m still working on trying to include in my day. I hope these things are helpful to everyone!
Here's a few Links you can check out for more info on
nutriotion and living a healthy lifestyle!
Articles on Nutrition:
Prayers Please ~ We have decided to add this section because so many of you have asked us to remember you or your loved ones in our prayers. We have never wanted to force religion on anyone, so if you don't pray, then skip this section and go on to the next! And if you do pray - add the people listed here to your prayer list. Mary (Snowprincess in our chats) has agreed to be in charge of this section, so please send your prayer requests to her - just put "BBuds prayer request" in the subject so she won't think it's junk mail! :)
"I am moving into an apartment on the
31st, and I am feeling a little overwhelmed and scared. I will be out on my own,
and I don't have any furniture and I would really like some, so if you could all
pray that God provide me with some that would be great. Thank you so much." ~
Vanessa Loyer
Alicia M needs prayers for the following: Michaela has a bad cough that is not getting better and a urinary tract infection. Hannah caught her cough too. My friend Shay who has been trying to get pregnant for eight years got pregnant five weeks ago and yesterday she lost the baby. My friend Ginger is facing a move and a divorce. And my husband and I are having some problems with his work.
"I have a prayers request for my daughter, I haven't heard from the parents.
Hoping they are not mad at me because I haven't heard from awhile. I am praying
that my daughter will come back to me and say thank you mom for doing what you
did and I pray I can get to see her grown up and visit her every year. In Jesus
name, I pray. AMEN. Thank you." ~Dawn Bush
"Please keep my brother in law, Joe, in your prayers. He is battling cancer and
may be having surgery soon. Also, please keep my mother in law in your prayers
as well. She is in the hospital again and is having problems keeping her blood
sugar stable." ~ Coley
"Hello my name is Olvia and I am a recent birthmother. My daughter was born on Feb 10, 05. I though that I was over the grieving part and began to come into the happy part but this week I was proved wrong. I have not been able to stop crying at all this week. I don't know why I am crying but I am. I am sure that has to do with the grieving. So can you please pray over me so that I can be strong so that I can get over this fall back that I am having. I also have another prayer request I was wondering if you guys could pray over my sister, her name is Raysa she just had her baby boy on Friday the 13 of May. And she was losing a lot of blood to where they had to keep her another day. The baby is fine from what I heard but can you please pray for this beautiful new family for me since I am no where near to help. I am across the country. I also ask that you pray that my daughter and my move to South Carolina goes great. Thanks so much" ~ Oliva
Mary has the following prayer requests: Please include my friend Lyn and her
husband Michael in your prayers, Lyn had a miscarriage last week. Also please
keep Jody H's little girl Savannah in your prayers as she started chemo again
this past Tuesday. Please keep Coley's BIL Joe in your prayers as he has
cancer. And Please say a special prayer for all our new birthmoms as they go
thru this difficult time in their lives.
Please pray for fellow BBud Marie who had open heart surgery recently. Pray she
continues to heal well.
Birthday Buds!
Amy Morse's
birth daughter Kaylee turned 1 on Jan 31 and Amy had the bright idea that
BirthMom Buds should give members the opportunity to announce their birthdays
and their birth children's bdays in the newsletter. If you would like to have
your or your birth child's birthday mentioned in this new section of the
newsletter, please email the birth date, your name or your child's name, to Amy
by the 25th of the month before your birthday. For example, if your child's
birthday is July 21, then you need to email it to Amy by June 25th! So
email
Amy with those July birthdays now! We hope you enjoy the new section and
thanks to Amy for her help with it!
Leah's birth daughter, Kaylee Ann, turns 1 on June 11.
Cathy Pruitt's birth
daughter, Rache's, birthday is June 12.
Amy Morse's birthday is
June 13th.
Jamie Vaught's birthday is June
13th.
Founder's Corner: A new little section to help keep you up to date with Coley and Lani as they share their lives, their thoughts, and what they're doing with BirthMom Buds.
Coley and Lani coordinated a BirthMother's Day event in Greenville, SC for Bmom's day on May 7th. It was held at a local hotel and was a lot of fun. They started the morning off with a "rap session" getting to know all the birthmoms. They did a craft, had lunch compliments of O'Charley's, did a balloon release and had several speakers as well as a candlelight ceremony and had punch and cake. Coley's favorite part of the day was just talking and getting to know all the different birthmothers and finally meeting Melanie (her mentee) in person. (Thanks for surprising me, Mel!) Lani's favorite part (aside from the cake) was hearing from all 3 sides of the triad. We both had a great time and can't wait for next year!! We hope more of you will be able to make it next year!
Inspiration: Little things to inspire a birthmom from poems, stories, and quotes to encouraging words.
by Brandy Mosley
Things have changed forever more.
Time has stood still.
No longer am I the little girl that I used to be.
The memories will remain close in my heart, but the Innocence is gone forever.
Through her adoption, so much knowledge has been gained.
And yet so many questions still remain.
Will the answers ever unfold?
Attitude and thoughts are now conceived so differently.
Who are the real friends, and who are the real enemies?
Who and what are the real priorities?
Will you still lose yourself trying to do for everyone else?
I think not, the most valuable lesson you have learned,
Your soul needs nourishing too.
But which path you take to do so, only you can decide.
The impact may be great, but I shall stay strong.
I now carry myself in a different way.
Some say for good, others say for worse.
But as long as I know and remember my reflections of yesterday,
Then I am the one who will say.
Emotions are so high, and so low, and in between,
I run fast, and chase them all day.
Never really knowing which one will be caught.
At this point and time in my life, I have certainly been put to the test,
But I can still try to do my very best.
There are still thoughts that I hold on to,
I still have my angels guiding me safely.
And I know that there will always be a rainbow after the storm,
And that tomorrow will be a different day, beginning with a new sunrise.
And with each person that has true passion and unconditional love for me,
Will remain by my side to help catch me if I shall fall or call.
Through all the changes that have taken place,
I know I still have my saving Grace.
I shall be aware, and hopefully better prepared for the years ahead.
They also will bring more change.
Is that not what time is suppose to do?
But I shall survive even if my little girl is not here,
I can still reflect back on my wonderful memories.
After all if it were not for her, I could not be the woman I am today.
Now is the time, to say goodbye to the Innocence of my childhood,
And really concentrate and savor the Innocence of my womanhood.
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Newsletter Manager